DICK CHENEY – BALLSY WITH NO BRAINS

Dick

Risë Birnbaum

Maybe Cheney should start counting backwards from 100 by 7 to check his cognitive abilities these days ‘cause the guy is making no sense at all.  There was more gibberish in Cheney’s Wall Street Journal op-ed than on Honey Boo Boo.

I mean, can we really blame Obama for the Iraq war?  No.  If anyone had war paint on it was Cheney himself, who told us all point blank that Saddam Hussein had weapons of mass destruction, and even linked Saddam to the September 11 attacks.  So let’s all vote for war instead of UN inspectors. Yay!

Dick Cheney himself was the head cheerleader for a war that cost us thousands of American men and women and trillions of dollars.  Yes, that’s trillions with a TR.  And what about the Cheney lines that we’d be “treated like liberators” and the war would take “weeks not months?”  Maybe it’s a Mayan calendar.

Is his memory failing?  Does he need some magic Dr. Oz supplements to help maintain his brain?

How can Cheney blame Obama for a nasty war he engineered with the help of fearless leader President George W. Bush?

Why doesn’t Cheney blame Obama for the Holocaust and Vietnam while he’s at it.

I cringed when President Clinton said “I never inhaled,” with a straight face, but the stuff Cheney is saying is way beyond cringe-worthy.  It’s pure bullsh*t.  In short, the guy has zero/nada/zilch/no shame.

Cheney had a successful heart transplant in 2012 and we won’t go into whether he got special treatment, but before that his heart would automatically get “shocked” if there were irregular beats.  Can you imagine Cheney getting shocked every time he told a lie?  Shock-a-rama!

To sum it up, even though Cheney has a new heart, I’m not sure at all it’s in the right place.  And as for a brain?  Let’s just call it small.

10 Gifs To Inspire Your Next Satellite Media Tour

Need to get the word out? Satellite Media Tours, or SMTs, are a great way to share your messaging, because you can do interviews with outlets across the country in just a few short hours. But how do you get the most out of your SMT? Here are some tips to help make your SMT a success!

1.  Time it right. 
Choose a date to maximize the impact of your messaging. Be aware of possible competing stories, and try to tie in your messaging to current events or industry trends and news.

 

2.  Bilingual Spokespersons.
Credit - http://www.fanpop.com/clubs/glee/images/29016077/title/im-bilingual-fanart
Consider using a bilingual spokesperson or two separate spokespersons to extend your audience reach to English and Spanish language media outlets.

 

3.  Here’s a genius thought: You can reach more people by booking more than just TV.

Despite TV being the dominant medium for SMTs, radio and online interviews can give added presence to your message.

 

4. Don’t hit the snooze button on pitching.
To ensure you get the best interviews possible, reach out early, ideally a month out.

 

5.  Make everyone feel special when you talk to them.

Localize each pitch interview with statistics that pertain to each market and type of viewer or listener.

 

6.  Don’t let your spokesperson say this.
Media training is a valuable resource to make sure your spokesperson engages audiences like a rock star!

 

7. No one likes a Sales Pitch
Try not to make your messaging sound like a sales pitch. Make your story newsworthy and talk about the news trends in a way that incorporates key messages, without sounding like an advertisement.

 

8.  Get the word out on every medium possible.
Spread the word about your SMT with digital, movie, fitness clubs and social media outreach. The average listener has to hear your message 7 times to remember it, so cross promoting increases the chance that your messaging will be retained.

 

9.  Keep distractions out of your background.
Your background can help tell your story in an interesting way, so take some time to make sure the background is something that complements your messaging and/or the image you want to convey.

 

10.  Contact zcomm and get some help.
Call us at 202-821-1020 x116 or visit www.zpr.com to book your SMT today!

KISS AND TELL

By Risë Birnbaum

What a smooch!  Who would have thought one kiss would go so viral the CDC is on red alert?

I mean everyone knows Michael Sam is gay.  So, instead of kissing his girlfriend or fiancée he locks lips with his partner who, yes, just happens to be a guy.

And yes, ESPN aired it.  They didn’t think about it, they just shot it and shared it.  And I say it’s about time.

If we’re having the ongoing conversation about gay marriage and gay rights and LGBTQ and all that it entails then the public should be brave enough to see a guy, on top of the world, kiss another guy.

And yes, we’re talking about a handsome football player getting drafted by an NFL team.

If anything, this kiss should go into a time vault as the moment that opened the public’s consciousness that this is the new norm.

Just think about it.  Kids watch the most violent video games, see movies with sex and violence and nudity and terrible language, and watch wrestlers turn into human pretzels.  And this?  It was just an emotional, in-the-moment kiss.

If we all keep it in context, I think even homophobes should be able to understand that the world is a changing.

And if Michael Sam is the guy who changes perception and history with the shot watched round the world, he deserves a pat on the back, not a kick in the head.

 

 

 

MONICA WANTS A PARDON

 

By Risë Birnbaum

There’s obviously not much going on around town these days in order for Monica Lewinski to grab headlines.  Now we have to read about Monica’s new confession now after all these years?  I just went online to CNN to actually catch up on the news and there isn’t much.

Continue reading

Is Oscar Pistorius guilty? zcomm chief Risë Birnbaum says get the jail cell ready.

OSCAR 3

Every morning I click online to watch the latest from the Pistorius murder trial. If you’ve been in a closet, cave or North Korea for the last year, Oscar Pistorius is the double amputee sprinter on trial for the murder of his model girlfriend, Reeva Steenkamp. The guy quivers daily like a bowl of jello (who wouldn’t when facing 25 years in a cozy South African jail cell with 28 other cellmates and no legs?).

I wake up, have a cup of coffee and bagel and watch pit bull prosecutor Gerrie Nel tear off another limb. Nel is NOT a big believer of Oscar’s story and has called him an outright liar (My Lady judge had to actually tell Gerrie to tone it down). Oscar tends to get even more emotional right before answering a crucial question so good thing they brought him a bucket (heave ho).

In between sobbing and heaving and puking and blubbering, Oscar managed to haltingly get out his side of the story which involved hearing a noise in the bathroom (doubtful), grabbing his pistol (at the ready), getting out of bed, entering the bathroom and and blasting four holes through the toilet door…all while thinking Reeva is still on the other side of the bed counting sheep (hardly).

He’s up on charges on first degree murder and now it’s the defense attorney’s chance to make their case which is basically that Oscar, ever worried about home intruders, thought there was one and fired, accidentally killing Reeva.

Don’t know about you, but I’m havin’ a hard time believing Oscar’s love story. Wherever I go I do my own mini-poll to see who believes what and so far 9 out of 10 say it’s manslaughter (not first degree murder). I totally agree and think they were having a fight, she ran to the bathroom and the guy went nuts, grabbed his gun and fired. After all, he is a guy who’s at home on the range.

We’ll see what the defense can do to balance the scales right after Easter break, but it’s obvious Oscar is on the hot seat and, for the first time, running for his life.

CRACKING THE BLOGGER CODE

Image

shescribes

 

BY: JASMINE WALTON

In the world of PR, blogger outreach is one of the sharpest, new arrows in our quiver. Why? More laser-targeted impressions, which means the right reach. And it’s only natural that followers are more likely to trust a blogger’s word over a branded ad.

Our zcomm team taps into the blogger world, in addition to other digital marketing tactics, to target specific audiences in industries including health, beauty, food, consumer and non-profits.

One of our key partner bloggers is Kimberly Vetrano, the founder of “She Scribes.” Kimberly doubles as a mother, wife, photographer and freelance writer. She decided to become a blogger because she loves to write, and blogging was a way to write about her life.

Kimberly prides herself on blogging about a variety of topics for a diverse readership. Her tag line is “A little bit of this, a little bit of that.” In fact, her blog topics are heavily influenced by her readers. She makes sure to read her fans’ comments, and even does yearly “polling” to find the topics that her readers find most interesting. In addition to blogging about her life, she also tracks and writes about what’s trending — crafts, recipes and style posts are all hot topics now.

When asked how she keeps her blog so active, Kimberly says her blog is her business, and she treats it that way. Kimberly says, “I make it a priority to post at least once a day, 7 days a week. If I have something planned on the weekend, I’ll write a post ahead of time and schedule it on the weekend.”

Kimberly tries to engage her followers through social media channels like Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, and Pinterest. “Social media influences my blog in a big way…there are plenty of readers who share the same interests and can engage with you about them on social media channels or via comments on the blog posts.”

Kimberly’s favorite social media outlet is Facebook. “I feel like I can connect with readers more on that platform. I can scroll down and read comments and reply to them when I have a chance. I feel like Facebook is more personal.”

When relevant brands come to zcomm for blogger outreach, we call Kimberly (and lots of other bloggers) with the kind of content that she loves. Because we know what she likes. So, when reaching out to bloggers, take time to read the blog on a regular basis BEFORE you contact them so you know exactly what they write about and the content that floats their boat. That’s the key to cracking the blogger code.

I Admit It – I Watch the Bachelor

And I’m really glad Juan Pablo is gone.

By Risë Birnbaum

This season was no bed of roses.   Juan Pablo Galavis, the latest bachelor, was the perfecto example of arrogant bastardo.  Every week I’d text a friend for two hours straight during the show and we’d talk about the fact the guy had absolutely zero to say except:  “you’re special.”  Unfortunately he called all the girls “special” at some point in the series.  Another running joke was senor peabrain would say “eeets OK” to just about any situation that came up.  I mean you could have fallen out of a palm tree and cracked your head open and El Bachelor would have said, “eeets OK.”

In short, the handsome jerk was rude, stubborn, dumb, macho and just plain mean.  The only things he had going for him were his stubble and smile.  I mean the guy’s not getting into MENSA anytime soon.

If you scan the news, you’ll see I’m not alone in my sketchy TV viewing habits.  Millions have tuned in to see this South American playboy, “Don Juan” Pablo, sweet talk his way with the women…all the way into bed with a few unlucky ones.

There were a few lucky ones who realized there really wasn’t much to him and left the show mid season.  Whew.  Close call.  But, poor Clare and Nikki, the two finalists!!

Here’s the deal on the last show and no need for spoiler alerts now.  Clare and JP went up for a copter ride when she told him she loved him.  That paved the way for the schmo of the show to say something crude and lewd back.  Clare was upset, but seemed to get over it on the night time date based on something really confusing JP said.  I mean, Chris Harrison didn’t even get where Juan Pablo was coming from, so how could we?

So, on to the proposal setting.  Lush St. Lucia.  Palms trees, flowers, waterfalls, and dumbass Juan Pablo.  First he gives Clare the brush off, but she gives as good as she gets.  And then it’s bended-knee time.  Nikki, the last blond standing, spends five minutes telling JP how much she loves him and he says what any brainless guy says, “I have the diamond ring in my pocket, but I’m not going to give it to you.”  Instead, he gives her…a rose and says he likes her…”a lot.”

My best guess is it’s a miracle if these two are really still together.  The best piece of advice I can give Nikki at this post-Bachelor moment in time is:  RUN!